Leil Shishi (Thursday Night): A.K.A. Party On

Thursday night. The mere mention of this date/time combo can and does have Bochurim everywhere drooling. The Yeshiva Bochur's single and only true vacation during the zman. Fridays don't count because, well, the oilam is poofing from the Thursday night extravaganzas. And even upon the eventual wakeup from that fitful slumber induced by pounds of pitzuchim plus the breweries of beer bottles consumed, one must prepare for Shabbos, etc. This leaves only Shabbos, which of course is no fun. Not that it isn't relaxing,kadosh, and all that, but it ain't fun. Motzei Shabbos is somewhat of a contender, but since Sunday is a regular day in the life of a Yeshiva Guy, not to mention Israelis in general, a self-imposed curfew is adhered to by most serious guys. Which leaves Thursday night.

So what is it, exactly, that we do on these vacation nights?

Before I continue, allow me to caution you, the dear reader, to pause for a moment and reflect before reading further. If your musag, your idea of Yeshiva Bochurim are rows and rows of white-shirt clad teenagers sitting in front of old, musty tomes and smoking up a storm whilst debating the intricacies of theGeonim of ages past, read no further. Not that the latter isn't true (especially the smoking part), but the fact of the matter is that everyone needs a breather. Bochurim have three. Bein Hazmanim (Succos, Pesach, and Summer), Bein Hasdorim (After davening, in between 1st and 2nd seder, and in between 2nd seder and night seder), and Thursday nights, which are a little of both.

And now, onwards and upwards delving into the mind of Bochurim. A final word of caution. It can be a dangerous place to spend too much time in, so if you are reading this and aren't a bochur, caveat lector.

We are highly pressured individuals. This is a fact. For those who have never personally experienced the Yeshiva world, try to imagine the intellectual rigors of Advanced-whatever college subject you studied, magnified tenfold. Then delete whatever activities you used to kick back and relax, be it sports, clubbing, or even reading a novel or two. Such delights are by and large forbidden to us, with good reason, and we require other forms of relaxation. Enter Thursday nights.

Your average bochur returns to the dira between 11-2 on a Thursday evening. Depending on what time he ended night seder, there may or may not be a cholent place still open. Options range from the reigning king of cholent, Deitsch in Meah Shearim, to Nehadar off of Malchei Yisroel, or other assorted grease joints that offer their own semi-homemade pots of the stuff for sale exclusively on Thursday nights. Alternatively, for the hard up among us, or those connoisseurs who simply can't stand the oil filled pots sold in Yerushalayim and prefer their own oil filled crock pots full of the toxic batter/brew, there is the homemade option. Which of course has bochurim the world over in an uproar over the pots that inevitably don't get cleaned for months on end...

(Have you ever seen leftover cholent that has been left to its own devices for a half year? I have. It isn't a pretty sight. Except to the petri-scientists worries about the potential extinction of fungus. And even they cringe, or so I'm told.)

So typically, we kick back with a cholent, or whatever other form of sustenance is available to us, and we'll swig a swallow of beer (or two, or three) and schmooze. That's it. Just schmooze. About everything and nothing. You know those intelligent fellows you meet up who shock you with their "worldliness"? Yup. It all comes from those Thursday night b**l sessions. Long, intense, and wide-ranging, there are almost no limits as to the topics they can cover. I've schmoozed with , or heard guys schmoozing about, on one random occasion or another, the following diverse concerns:

Quantum physics, cooking/recipes, nanotechnology, Mayan anthropology, genetics, secular authors like Grisham and others, solar physics, Chinese politics, and other such sundry subjects.

As mentioned above, liberal amounts of beer or other light alcoholic beverages are consumed, as well as cigarettes by the carton. Marlboro Lites are the preferred cancer stick of choice, although the more hard-core among us may prefer Reds at times. The story goes that the Rabbonim of a number of Yeshiva's were planning on banding together to levy a ban against these Leil Shishi parties. Supposedly, the execs at Phillip Morris caught wind of the plan, and donated a new wing to BMG (Lakewood) under an assumed name- (Rachein Vaiter)- and to this day you can find that name on the "In Memoriam" plaque in Yoshon (the old Beis Medrash in Lakewood).

And so the next time you find yourself in the embarrassing position of losing a debate to a Yeshiva Guy in a secular subject, simply challenge his source for his argument/data. And watch him cave like a dira of cards, and thank The Yeshiva Guy inside.

And so until next Thursday night, it's me, your loyal Yeshiva Guy, bringing you the inside scoop of everything Yeshivish. Stay holy brothers!

You Know You're in Eretz Yisroel When...

...The Local Druggie burns his hovel up, and random bochurim pitch in to help him out.

...The waitress at the restaurant informs you in no uncertain terms that she'll take her tip in cash, (omits please).

...A lady give $100,000 to HU. The lady was homeless.

...You're impressed by your Egged-mates' shtatty looking Oyster Perpetual watch...until upon closer inspection you realize it says "Rol(od)ex" on it, not Rolex.

...Cars and motorcycles arbitrarily disobey traffic laws...why not?

...A random, fatherly type dude on the train scolds you, loudly, for putting your feet up- in a mussardike way. (Happened to friend).

...There, the Blacks speak Hebrew. Here, the Hebrews speak Black> (Israelis love showing off their poor command of ebonics).

...Ten men gather together to daven in a minyan...and no two belong to the same sect/denomination.

...There, the cars are BIG. Here, the cars are smallll.

...The beggars wear tefillin.

...You walk into an innocent looking coffee house to get a Coke and use the internet, and the waiter tells you "It isn't kosher here".

...You go out on a shidduch, and have loads of fun. With the wrong girl.

...You're bored at 2AM, but never fear...you can always go to the Kosel, and have a heart to heart with G-d.

...You can't for the life of you figure out the parking lot's pricing matrix...because it doesn't make any sense.

...All around you, (chareidi) men are wearing tighter shirts than (chiloni) ladies.

...You can't get over the fact that the three primary colors are not, in fact, BWB (Black, White,Black).

...People are rioting! Wait...why? No one is sure.

...Free hot cocoa; no, not in camp, but at the Kosel.

One Yid's Chillul Hashem is the other Yid's Kiddush Hashem

And that, folks, is exactly what is going on here.

I must say, that as an occasional (former?) reader of the infamous VIN and YWN news blogs, I was quite disappointed at their biased coverage of the two recent hafganah affairs in our Holy City. And here comes the kicker...their bias was towards the secular! In fact, the type of chareidi hating, Brisk-bashing, anti- frum fest that was going on in the inspired comments below those articles was nothing short of sickening. And to think that these frum websites were goreim those comments from frum yidden. Whatever happened to Hilchos Lashon Hara???

It is critical, especially when dealing with remote media channels, to verify and double verify such type of information before passing it on. The scenes described in the above mentioned news outlets are simply copied from various secular media agencies, and NOT TRUE. (Yes, the secular media does have a bias against the chareidim. Wake up.)
That ostensibly frum news channels run stories, and particularly of the volatile and potentially Chillul Hashem causing type we're discussing, without due diligence in their fact checking is worse than atrocious. Its assur.

And its high time someone said something about it. So there you go. I hate to be a hater, but it had to be said.

And if you're in any way confused about what the flip I'm talking about,...then move on- this blog ain't for you.

(Above photo taken on Yechezkel, near Kikar Shabbos, on Thu., July 16th).

Protesting the "Machoh" Protesters

Everyone's favorite illiterate yeshivishe blog (U'kshmo kain hu") recently ran a piece submitted by a lady who claims to live near the area of the recent Hafganos near Kikar Shabbos...

The Yeshiva World » Out Of The Mailbag: American Bochrim Wrecking Havoc At Hafganos » Frum Jewish News

What to say here? Unquestionably, she has a point. Bochurim do need hashgacha. For example, I am familiar with one wild hoodlum who maintains some sort of blog, chronicling his experiences in Israel...probably using that unfiltered Internet in his dira, late at night. Also, its true, rov guys do go to have fun. See the action. Perhaps heckle a mishtara or two. You get the point.

At the same time, there are many bochurim who attend these rallies because of a deep seated need to register their feelings of protest at the medina's treatment of our city. Personally, I'm familiar with at least two bochurim who are locked up, and no doubt; the feelings of pain for our holy Yerushalayim are there. And when these fine, upstanding young men suffer for what they believe in, who are we to deride them? Are they really so different than the many Yerushalayimer men who attend these protests?

She quotes, and I quote, "R’ Avraham Yehoshua of Brisk said this week when one of his bochrim were arrested, “vos tut a bochur bei a mechoa?” - what is a bochur doing by a protest? (Bold and italics mine).

As she may or may not know, our good Rosh Yeshiva is the inveterate politician. Always playing to the crowd. Seriously, take not a word he says publicly seriously.

Either way,the bochur who was arrested?
American.
And does he regret it?
Doubtful.
Why?
See the above paragraphs.

'Nuff said.

Oh. Almost forgot my cutesy little quote.
"V'shavu vanim l'gvulam". Amen.

(Photo by sonnglod)